Transforming Into a More Complete and Whole You
There was a time in my life when I felt broken and displaced. I suffered Depression and Anxiety to a point where it gave me physical pain nearly every moment of every day. I do not like to share this part of myself with ANYONE. However, in order to help each other and create a community of trust we cannot only share the best parts of our lives. The grass is only greener in someone else’s yard because it is fake. Or, at the very least, it is not showing us a complete picture.
Amidst my struggles I had a fervent need for consolidation and a longing for the simplicity of my former life. It took a long while before I could acknowledge that we are meant to be dynamic and these experiences create opportunities for critical developmental change.
We have experienced a world wide COVID 19 pandemic, social unrest, political divisiveness to a degree before unseen, and massive changes in day-to-day life events. These massive changes are creating record transformation on a global and on a personal scale. A transformation of societal values, a transformation of our relationships, a transformation of who we believe we are as a person… How will we choose to transform?
These are some of the things that I am asking myself with the current situation:
Will I choose to be in a bad mood with my family when fuel prices go up yet again, another government public health initiative is defunded, basic human rights are being denied, the list could go on... Or will I choose to get creative and enlist my family, friends, and community to help me out by making small changes on a local level.
Will I choose to allow my children to go and play with the neighbor kids who have decided not to vaccinate their children. Or will I make everyone miserable by complaining about how these neighbors may “accidentally kill someone” with their negligent behavior. Or will I stop doing housework for 30 minutes in order to make time to provide additional teaching moments for my children and allow them to be a part of this beautiful community.
Will I long for when the world will get back to what I consider normal life; when it never will. Or will I take time to enjoy each moment and live in the present.
I endeavor to inspire hope and joy in the daily wonders of the marvelous simplicities in our lives. But sometimes we need to reflect on the moments that bring us face down on the pavement, resulting in a broken rib and a bloody nose. Okay this is figurative…But, seriously.. this is what life experiences can really feel like. Sometimes it is hard to see the good in this world and that is okay.
We can get lost in our own crushing doubt. We doubt that we can find life fulfillment amongst the uncertainty of the future. We doubt that society can ever piece itself back together to become whole again. But what we may not realize is that those original pieces no longer fit together any more to make a complete picture.
We have to find new pieces and painstakingly shape them to make a new whole. We will have scars and gaps in that which we thought was familiar. But society is not marred and ugly. We are made more beautiful as we stand straight and strong to endure and thrive in a different world.
If we can forgive ourselves of our mistakes we can move forward with new resilience. This may be the hardest to come by. Forgiving ourselves of our stupidity, our ignorance, our blunders… To become something different..something better.
At a time when the world may feel isolated and many are more physically alone than ever, let us all remember these words from children’s book author Nancy Tillman:
“In the green of the grass…in the smell of the sea… in the clouds floating by…at the top of a tree… in the sound crickets make at the end of the day…
“You are loved. You are loved. You are loved,” they all say.”
We are not alone. We can choose to be there for each other and transform into a more beautiful whole.